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Jokes and Funny Sayings
12-29-2011, 09:16 PM
Post: #191
RE: Jokes and Funny Sayings
(12-29-2011 09:11 PM)RN-PRN Wrote:  
(12-29-2011 09:09 PM)boomer Wrote:  Why in the WORLD would anyone in their right mind...CRY in a Ferrarri?

Tears of joy???

Money doesn't buy happiness!

The Groundhog lied.
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12-29-2011, 09:57 PM
Post: #192
RE: Jokes and Funny Sayings
Oh you mean like when I bought Marilyn? Like - sobbed like a child the whole way home kind of crying?

For You Steve & Monica - Your Love will forever shine on in our hearts!!!

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12-30-2011, 08:38 AM (This post was last modified: 12-30-2011 08:38 AM by Mufasa.)
Post: #193
RE: Jokes and Funny Sayings
It may not - but I'm willing to take that chance.
Ya' know - in the name of scienceCool

You signed the contract - you must do my bidding
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12-30-2011, 09:38 AM
Post: #194
RE: Jokes and Funny Sayings
Where can I sign up for that experiment?

For You Steve & Monica - Your Love will forever shine on in our hearts!!!

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12-31-2011, 12:06 AM
Post: #195
RE: Jokes and Funny Sayings
(12-29-2011 09:57 PM)boomer Wrote:  Oh you mean like when I bought Marilyn? Like - sobbed like a child the whole way home kind of crying?

I teared up when I saw Echo in the showroom floor all cleaned up and ready for me. The sales staff still tell that story to people...Blush

But no, money cannot buy happiness, in general...

Love and respect...
Turn up the music and smile!
"Adventures..."
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12-31-2011, 01:46 AM
Post: #196
RE: Jokes and Funny Sayings
(12-29-2011 09:16 PM)nettiesaur Wrote:  
(12-29-2011 09:11 PM)RN-PRN Wrote:  
(12-29-2011 09:09 PM)boomer Wrote:  Why in the WORLD would anyone in their right mind...CRY in a Ferrarri?

Tears of joy???

Money doesn't buy happiness!

Maybe not. But it will buy me a Porsche so I can pull up next to it Wink

... in a world where I feel so small I can't stop thinking big!
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12-31-2011, 08:18 AM
Post: #197
RE: Jokes and Funny Sayings
(12-31-2011 01:46 AM)Scythe Matters Wrote:  
(12-29-2011 09:16 PM)nettiesaur Wrote:  
(12-29-2011 09:11 PM)RN-PRN Wrote:  
(12-29-2011 09:09 PM)boomer Wrote:  Why in the WORLD would anyone in their right mind...CRY in a Ferrarri?

Tears of joy???

Money doesn't buy happiness!

Maybe not. But it will buy me a Porsche so I can pull up next to it Wink

Well, what I meant was, crying in your Ferrari or Porche may having nothing to do with the car.

The Groundhog lied.
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01-03-2012, 03:34 AM
Post: #198
RE: Jokes and Funny Sayings
Just heard a good one...

A woman gave me her number once. It was the square root of negative one. I said, "You're being irrational."

and

They should release Groundhog Day again but call it Groundhog Day II.

... in a world where I feel so small I can't stop thinking big!
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01-24-2012, 12:05 PM (This post was last modified: 01-24-2012 12:07 PM by VincentUlyssis.)
Post: #199
RE: Jokes and Funny Sayings
(01-03-2012 03:34 AM)Scythe Matters Wrote:  Just heard a good one...

A woman gave me her number once. It was the square root of negative one. I said, "You're being irrational."

and

They should release Groundhog Day again but call it Groundhog Day II.

I like your irrational joke. I'm sharing that with the math chair. Nice.
(01-24-2012 11:19 AM)Rey Wrote:  So now it is the year 2012. For Christmas I was lucky enough to receive a flux capacitor as a gift. That is so cool because I have always wanted one. So I decided to use it and build a Time Travel Vehicle. I found the DeLorean car to be too expensive so instead I used a 1992 Toyota Previa. This looks more like a time machine than a DeLorean anyway. I put it all together and got it working pretty good, but not perfectly.

I am able to travel back in time to almost any year. The trouble is I cannot stay for very long. After a few minutes the Previa will start to hum and distort in appearance, which means it is about to return to the present. So I had better be in it or be stranded. So I can go back but have to stay near the vehicle. So far I have been to the years 1854 and 1940, but ended up only in a random location and wasn't able to see much. Time away averaged about 5 minutes. I would like to be able to witness some historical events but that will need some work to be able to do that.

2112!
I am also able to go into the future, but this allows for even less time before having to return, sometimes less than a minute. But I could not help myself, I had to see the year 2112! So I set the dial and held my breath. It worked and I arrived, and I hurried out of the vehicle to get a quick look around. I had also brought my camera so I could get a picture.

It was dark, and I immediately saw this strange creature hurrying towards me, and it seemed to be quite upset. It looked like a human but I couldn't tell if it was a man or a woman. Maybe there is no gender in the future? I snapped a quick picture and jumped back into the Previa to drive away to safety. I drove about a hundred feet and the van hummed and returned to the present. I was shocked by what I had seen but I was safe.

But of course I have the picture, and I will share it with you now. But I'm warning you the future is not pretty, so be prepared before you click.

(Inspired by forum friend Ice Cold)

Rey, 2112 is definitely a strange period for fashion. Looks like an androgenous football player from the 1920's....or something along those lines.Big Grin

"Wish I didn't know now what I didn't know then."
"Try to catch the deluge in a paper cup."
"Every new beginning comes from some other beginning's end."
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01-26-2012, 11:19 AM
Post: #200
RE: Jokes and Funny Sayings
My buddy in Florida sent me this one this morning...no offense to anyone from Arkansas!

Arakansas Redneck: "Pharmacist, let me have a 12 pack of condoms please!"

Pharmacist: "Would you like a bag for these?"

Arkansas Redneck: "Heck no, my sister ain't THAT ugly"!Tongue

And Rey, my Dad retired from Burroughs, he may have a spare one laying around!

"Rollin' numbers, rock-n-rollin', got my Kiss records out!"
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