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The things kids say...
09-22-2010, 04:08 PM
Post: #1
The things kids say...
My 2 year old son has had a couple of doozies this week.

The other day, I was dropping him off with my sister. Right before I left, I bent down to his neck and said "NOM NOM NOM! I GET YOU!" Then I jumped in my car and took off. A minute later my cell phone rang, and my sister was laughing. She said "After you took off, Jameson got really quiet, then he looked at me and said in this quiet, gruff voice 'Mommy is danger. Mommy is a monster!' then he growled." Hilarious.

Just now, he came running into the living room, with one of my bra's that was sitting on top of the hamper. He goes "Mommy, put on your bar on you boobies!"

Load me up, folks. These stories are the best!
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09-22-2010, 04:24 PM
Post: #2
RE: The things kids say...
LOL!

I have a 12 year old, who still thinks like a much younger child, and he comes up with some interesting things to say as well. My signature line right now is a quote from him.

I finally made a fan page on Facebook for his sayings because several friends, who find him amusing, kept telling me that I should.

He was staying with a friend of mine a few months ago, and she offered him a cream soda (which he had never heard of), and he said, "No thank you, I don't like cream in my soda".

A party without cake is really just a meeting
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09-22-2010, 04:37 PM
Post: #3
RE: The things kids say...
Anybody remember that program "Rescue: 911" ? ? ?

My wife took our THEN 4 year old daughter to the store to look for some jeans and get some kids clothes. on the way to the register, our daughter spotted, of all things, a Barbie doll. Mistake No. 1 was when my wife stopped to let said daughter look at one, but when my wife prepared to leave, the daughter was not READY to leave Barbie. Thee feud ensued between the then 38 year old mommy and 4 year old daughter, and the more my wife said no, the louder daughter screamed. When my wife removed said Barbie from daughters hands, the four year old SCREAMS - at the TOP OF HER LUNGS, for everyone in SIBERIA To hear - - - "CALL 911 - CALL 911"

I won't repeat what mommy said to daddy when daddy got home from work, but it had something to do with anatomy and my family lineage!

Primary Principle - "It must NEVER be my fault"
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09-22-2010, 04:49 PM
Post: #4
RE: The things kids say...
Boomer, I sympathize with your wife! I really do.

When my daughter was 2, I had her in a shopping cart in the fabric store, and we were cruising the aisles. She started saying "Stop it!" rather loudly, and several times. I was trying not to laugh and at the same time telling to stop, because you never know what busy body might assume that the child is being abused and feel the need to call CPS. So my child stopped saying "stop it!" and instead yelled "CROTCH!"

A party without cake is really just a meeting
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09-22-2010, 08:21 PM
Post: #5
RE: The things kids say...
Oh - we laugh about it now, and my daughter (who is 23 now!) always gets so embarassed about the whole thing. But when it happened, it was one of those 90 degree plus summer days, the AC on the car broke, etc etc. You know the routine.

Kids will say the darndest things, but man...sometimes!

Primary Principle - "It must NEVER be my fault"
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09-22-2010, 10:54 PM
Post: #6
RE: The things kids say...
How about some of the darndest things that kids do..........like if you have a toddler boy.........who parks 13 Hotwheels cars and a plastic boat in the drain of your toilet, thus requiring his father to take the toilet apart, to pull out the toys.

Or years later (actually 2 years ago, on our 14th anniversary), how, that same boy, age 10, didn't want to go to church on a Wednesday night, and called 911 on an inactive cell phone, from under his bed, hoping to get our car towed away so we wouldn't be able to go. Imagine my surprise as I was making dinner and a Sheriff's deputy arrived at our door to see if we were ok, because they received 8 incomplete 911 calls from a cell phone at our house.

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09-23-2010, 06:15 AM
Post: #7
RE: The things kids say...
Ahhhhh yes....the cell phone trick. My oldest did that with my first cell phone (then flip phone) to see if she really COULD talk to someone.

One time both of our daughters refused to go to Grandma's house (my mother) because she made them eat "icky stuff" like liver and onions. To prevent themselves from going they tried to "barricade" themselves into their room by blocking it with Barbie dolls and stuffed bears. When I opened the door, their line of defense crumbled, and they ended up screaming in the highest shrilling scream you could ever humanly produce. The neighbors heard that. Called 911 AFTER we had left. Got back to the house about 10 pm put the girls to bed, and just before 11, there was a knock. Washington County Sheriff had gotten a call that we were "killing" out kids, but after the officer checked both kids, realized this was a non call, apologized about 50 times, and left.

Primary Principle - "It must NEVER be my fault"
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09-23-2010, 05:27 PM
Post: #8
RE: The things kids say...
I remembered another instance with my son that happened a couple of years ago. We had taken him to the doctor to get a vaccination, and it had been a long time since he had had one. So the nurse came in and swabbed his arm with alcohol, and he asked her if it was the like the kind that makes you drunk. She told him that no, this isn't the kind that you drink. So he piped up and said with a smile, "Oooooh, then it's good liquor!"

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09-23-2010, 05:35 PM
Post: #9
RE: The things kids say...
One of my students(age 6) took FOREVER in the bathroom this morning. His excuse: "pooping takes a long time ya know."
Yeah right, not when it's before recess. Then he's out in a flash.

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09-23-2010, 05:54 PM
Post: #10
RE: The things kids say...
Wait wait wait - it does TOO take a long time. I can personally vouch for that one, and if you dont believe me, just ask my wife. Her complaint is "Why dont you use the DOWNSTAIRS bathroom!?!?!". Big Grin

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